And I have been doing lots of planting. And not just flowers and vegetables.

This past week,  I put my beloved green bean seeds into my raised garden boxes. Magically, just a few days later, they were peeking out of the soil and growing towards the sun. Towards me.

At the end of last summer, I wrote about my love of green beans and how I search each day among the green leaves for the green beans.  I love this game.

This year, I doubled the fun and also planted peas.

These pea pods make me smile.  Everyday I go out and look for them and eat them right off the vine. And the vines are inspiring too.  I want to add these into my art…all the twists, circles and loops.

I have two raised garden beds right on the side of my house where the sun shines so brightly.  My sweetie and son built these for me on Mother’s day a few years ago.

What a gift!

This year, I am more in the mindset of less is more in the garden.  

It is only filled with everything I love.  With more space in between for growth.

Raspberries. Swiss chard.  Green beans.  Peas.  Lettuce (almost on its way out). Basil.  Cilantro. Parsley. And one little Mexican cherry tomato plant that bravely made its’ way back from last year.  This plant is amazing.  It grows so big it almost needs a garden box of its’ own.  Now it has tons of space to be magical.

And I planted flowers.  Lots of flowers right beside the vegetables.

I bought a bunch of flowers to plant weeks ago.  And I just left them sitting between the two raised beds.

They survived weeks of sitting there but they didn’t thrive.  Then I put them into the soil.

And the rains came…so much rain.

And within a day they bloomed.  What a good reminder for me.  Sometimes you just have to put the seeds in the soil and step back.  Just planting them is enough.

Ideas are seeds too.  And many ideas that I have had are blooming too.  But I had to put them into the soil.

I was just awarded a grant through Jump Street to create and install a three dimensional, recycled art installation in the Hershey Medical Center Cancer Institute in-patient area. I cannot wait to be a part of someone’s healing process.  So honored.  So ready.

This is the second grant I have received this year.  Seeds planted.  Flowers blooming.  I had no prior experience applying for grants.  This has so much to do with listening and then taking action.  People who support my art and want to work with me point me in the right direction.  I listen and look.   Put a seed in an inch or two deep and step back.  

This week, I handed in all my paperwork to have my art in UncommonGoods.  I know it will be online. I would love it in the catalog.  I am so happy to be working with this group of creative people.

Little seeds put in the soil. Then phones calls, emails and following up.  Very much like fertilizer, water and sunshine.

I presented my art and ideas to them last year in Brooklyn.  That was a magical day.  A game changer.  I wrote about that here.  Tara Gentile was on the guest panel.  I was able to see my potential through her eyes for a moment.  Brilliant eyes indeed.  Her words and vision pointed me in the direction of my first grant.  So grateful.

I can think of so many things I need to do.  Should do.

But I can’t help but be inspired by Willy, my daughter’s five-pound chihuahua.

Willy is an opportunist. And a well rested one.

I love that about him.  I see the pair of slippers I just took off.

Willy sees a nap.  And a very warm bed.

If I was more like Willy, I would not wash clothes. Instead I would curl up in them.

And Willy loves it when I don’t make the bed.  The uneven corners hanging down make the best nest.  He finds the tiniest corner and uses all of it, like Goldilocks.  He looks for and finds “just right”.

This is me and Willy at the start of most days. This is me and Willy right now.

Me, checking in on my computer. Trying not to fall into a black hole.  Willy nestled on my lap.

They all walked into my studio recently to see my space and my art and hear what I had to say about it all.  Ten girls in a second grade Brownie Troop.

We talked about inspiration.

It is a full time job I explained.   It all comes from deep inside and I have to work on it all the time. Dig in. Pull it out. I hang little bits and pieces so enticingly in my studio so that I will want to pick them up and play.  And also so I know where they are.

I am so grateful for clothespins and string.

We talked about ideas.  And protecting them with copyrights.  And also being aware of other people’s work.  And making sure we give them credit for their ideas.

That lovely thin line where we are inspired and find our own way as we are look at what others have created before us.

Most importantly we talked about how amazing they are.  They are completely unique and so is their vision.  It feels so right when we honor that.  We are all so good at being us.

Then we took reclaimed signage that was cut into flowers and each girl created a tiny bouquet.

We painted outside on the farm and used mistake paint.

We created beauty from something that had no value.

We saw yes where others saw no.

We had a moment and a badge.

They created as individuals and as a group, cleaning off their paintbrushes on this canvas below that will be the background for a mixed media piece I will do when I am inspired to do so.  I added some paste to it already.

And I told them again they were amazing.

A few days later I took my daughter to see the film Girl Raising.  It was powerful.

It showcased nine true stories about the human spirit, resilience and how educating girls can change the world. Our world.

You can host a local screening of this film. Bring it your community.  Bring it to your daughter. Check it out here.

All this made me think back when I was a Girl Scout leader and my sweet girl was one of those little feet.  Now her feet are the same size as mine.

And about how it takes a community to raise empowered, strong girls who will go on to do great things.

To be creative.

To dare to be themselves.

To see yes where others see no.

We are all girls rising.  Everyday.

*Oh what a busy time of year.  Lately raising and supporting strong girls has been on my mind. How lucky are we to be female…to have each other.  We are rising every day.  And raising each other up on our shoulders to be stronger. To have a voice. To be heard. Has someone lifted you up lately? Have you taken a moment to help a girl rise?  I know you have.   I would love to hear about it. xo

This past week, someone asked me to reflect on what exquisite self care feels like. Because that is what they wished for me.

And I have been thinking about this question all week.

At first, I felt defensive, so I have to look a bit closer. A nerve has been exposed.

And here is why.

While I may be building a nest in my backyard (my last post), I have not been building one in my studio.

I rush.  I try to do everything.  Be everything.  I over schedule myself.  I do not allow myself space to be early.  Or space to be late.  I am often “on” when I really need to be “off”.  Off the computer.  Off my iPhone.

I multi-task.  I eat lunch as I work.  Pick up a fork…then pick up a paintbrush.

When I am home, a little voice says to me “You are going to read?  Throw a load of wash in. Turn on the dishwasher…get something done.”

And none of this is the mindset I want to role model for my son or daughter.  I don’t want to teach them that owning my own business means I am constantly doing. Rushing.

For me, exquisite self care is tender and slow.

It is fresh picked wild flowers all over my studio.

It is pauses and deep breaths.  And places to rest.

As I thought more about exquisite self care,  I realized my studio was not set up for it at all.

I spend most of my time in the middle room of my art cottage.   It is a magical little room with a fireplace and low ceilings where people have gathered for over 200 years.

Yet, I had no place to gather.  I had three work desks.  Three.  But no place to rest.  Just places to create.  To make.  To be busy.

So, with the help of my sweetie, we moved the comfy chaise lounge from the very back room into this space.  And moved a large work bench into the back room.

And the change in energy was instant.  I gave myself permission to stop.  To rest.  To take a nap.  And for others to do so too.

See Willy on the couch?  He is so good at resting.

Exquisite self care is present.  It means consciously putting things in their place.   Not spending time each day looking for keys or a cell phone.

So I stopped and consciously put things away.

One of the biggest changes was putting all my art books in this vintage bookcase I bought at an estate sale for $6.  It was a huge move.

Once all my art books were put in this bookcase, then all my art supplies could go on the shelves where my books used to be.

The air in my studio was getting fresher by the second.

I have miles to go as I relearn how to be in this mindset.  I used to be here a bunch.  But not in a really long time.

I wound myself up tight. Now I am unwinding.  Slowly. Right here.  And I want to stay.

Funny, others do too.  My husband has been at my studio more in three days than he was in a month.

I cannot help but notice that the better I take care of myself, exquisite self care, the better everyone feels around me.  They feel welcomed.  And they want to stay.

ps. I have been wanting to write a “fearless Friday” post for weeks.  And I have written five at least.  All are unpublished.  This one felt right.  Anything you want to share?  How are you taking exquisite self care of yourself? What does exquisite self care feel like for you? I would love to hear. xo

And yes.  I know it is Saturday.  But it feels like a Friday.  A fearless one.

Simply this. For me,  I think all my days need to wind down here. Till at least October.  In this hammock loaded with pillows and blankets. Cozy and warm.

We all need a soft nest outside.  A place to shut our eyes and just do nothing in the fresh air.

A cozy outdoor bed, next to the koi pond with the water trickling and flowers blooming. This is where my day wound down yesterday.

I napped here.  I also read a mindless book nestled next to my sweetie.

The day did not actually start out with as much promise. Me and my love had plans but it took us hours to get out the door. Me on the computer answering emails. Him on the computer paying bills.  Me cleaning under the bed.  Sweetie filing something.

When we finally got in the car, we were both angry at the other because it took so long to get moving…to unplug.

A bit of an exchange with a tone from each of us, and then we were treasure hunting at a flea market.  Holding hands.  Supporting the other.  Remembering that this is what it is all about.  Fresh air.  And love.  Lots and lots of love.  And flowers blooming everywhere.

We drove further into the sweet town of Lambertville, NJ, parked the car and ran three miles on the canal.  Talking.  Exchanging.  Breathing in the fresh air.  Looking at the rebirth all around us.  Taking in every bit of spring time.

Being grateful.  Being outdoors.

We ate lunch at a little cafe after our run.  We were not as well dressed as those around us, but so happy to be outside and together.

So here is my Earth Day wisdom.

Plant pansies and get your hands dirty. Say positive affirmations as you put them in the soil. Fingers crossed both bloom.

Look what is growing in the grass. Vinca is sprouting up and blooming everywhere at my studio. But you have to make the time to look down.

And the view gets even better the closer I get to the ground.

Be aware of the unfolding around you.  An angel told me last week to sit beside a the same plant outside daily as spring blooms around us. Sit with the same single intention and the same life force in the flower will grow inside me too.  Yes.  An angel told me that.

I am listening.

Plant lettuce, spinach  and swiss chard in every color today.  No gloves.  Feel the earth in your hands. Like paint, dirt washes off.

Frame nature.  You must have old frames lying around.  Frame an actual flower. Get creative. Put some old paint on the frame to add color. I had to get one reusing tip in, right?

And lastly, make a bed outside.  A nest. In a hammock, on a blanket or in a tree house.  And unplug.  Just be.  Do nothing.

This is what I have been working on…getting better at doing nothing.

And it feels really good when I do “nothing” well.

ps. Are you going to make an outdoor bed? Build a nest and send me a picture to put here. colleen(at)coleenattara(dot)com. xo

I have no idea where you have been  or who you have been hanging out with. You are here now.  That is what counts. And I am so grateful and happy to see you.

Come on in.

Now that you are here, I have lots of colorful, hopeful work to do and gardens to plant.

I am getting ready to install my recycled window box flowers on a vacant building in Trenton, NJ as part of a grant I received from the I Am Trenton Foundation.

Here is my vision photoshopped on a gorgeous Brooklyn brownstone.

And below is one of the locations I am considering doing my installation on.

It is across from a school with a beautiful new playground.  And this is what the children see when they look across the street.

The very first house is owned by the City of Trenton and is one of two locations I am considering. It needs lots of love. More than just I can give it.

And that is what makes this a really good location.

It would get lots of love and attention from the school, from the students, from the community and from groups in the city that would come and clean it up.

Then I would plant a recycled garden in window boxes.  A garden that says the kids on that playground are so worth it.  This house is so worth it.  And this neighborhood is so worth it.  Worth our time and attention. 

It is about neighborhood “stabilization” not just neighborhood revitalization. Neighborhood stabilization is a new word for me and a really important one.  I know that my recycled flower window box gardens have the power to heal in their beauty and their story.  And that has to do with me.

But the power of this run down home is that several groups have to come together first before I can do my installation.

And that just makes those little recycled flowers made from salvaged plastic signage a bit more magical.

This property calls for me to look past my vision of my project and see it as something bigger.  To see it as a way to rally a larger group of people.

This little patch of spring flowers was fighting its’ way through the mess in the front yard when I visited.  If there is a will there is a way, right?

There were other signs of hope and renewal that day in Trenton.

Pieces of art and color in unexpected places.

And creativity.

My recycled flowers would look good in these window boxes too, wouldn’t they?

I love this door.

My friends live here. They are so silly and brilliant.  Cookie Monster is done in painter’s tape.  No, this was not done to delight a child; it was just done to delight themselves.  And if it makes those passing by smile, all the better.

I will report back here as I move forward on my project.  As I make the road by walking.

And as I step aside and make choices that expand my vision by letting other people’s vision in.

That is where the beauty is.  It is in collaboration.

And letting others take what you see and make it bigger and more powerful.

And most importantly, more healing.

ps. Art does heal.  I know that for sure. And I know I want to plant these recycled flower box gardens on vacant buildings in cities across the United States. xo.

When we just sit down beside some paint, paper and crayons and stop thinking so hard. Our life is divine and messy. It looks so good outlined in watercolor pencils.

I have been teaching a course at a local art center that honors our own unique journey on the pages of an altered book.

We have been painting, tearing, sewing, mixing, cutting and pasting on these pages.

And on a few days, Devon John, a gifted photographer, came in and witnessed us putting pieces of ourselves on the pages

And took lots of pictures as the unraveling began.

I love teaching this process.

Trust. Get the first layers down.  Do not over think it.  Play.

This is just the first of many layers.

Just get it down. Then breathe.  Lean in.

Each layer is full of bits and pieces of things we save.  Of ourselves.

Moments we tuck into drawers, pockets and books.  Not exactly sure why we are saving them, only sure that we must.

Some sew the pages with the intention to give their altered book as a gift.

Others honor their own journey; looking back and looking forward.

One student honors a magical place and time.  A trip saved in the pages of an old book so she can visit again.

We cut into the pages.  And into our past.

And we write.  Just write.

Without planning or thinking.  We just let what comes out, out.

Knowing we can rip out a page. Or paint over our words if we chose to.

But trusting that some magic may just flow out of us.

And we will catch it on our painted pages when it does.

Art is good therapy.  I am so grateful to this process and these woman who share this space with me. xo

ps. I shared some more details on creating altered books here.  Take a peek.  Jenelle is going to change the way we consume and create.

Lately one day is balmy while the next day is high winds and snow. And as much as I would love to be planting pansies and let my toes be free in flip flops, today is not that day.

I am all snuggled up in this handmade coat as I head for my studio. 

This is how I wear it; inside out.

All the detail and colors keep me warm on the inside and peek out at the cuffs and collar.  I wear most of my clothes inside out due to painting and my love of big messes.

This coat used to be an old bedspread. A close friend of mine, Deb Allen (so much talent here), saw it at a flea market.  I had asked her to please make me a grown up coat.

She had been making these amazing little girl coats I loved.  My daughter had one she wore for years.  I wanted my own.  So Deb spotted this bedspread and thought of me and saw the possibility of what it could become.

And made me this amazing coat.

And I made her a piece of my art in exchange and stretched a bit too. My primary color palette became pastel. Soft pink, blue and mint green flowers overflowed from vases all made from recycled materials.

A bit more about this coat.  I love these seams that are so thick and vintage and sewn on the inside that is now the outside.  There is also a big hood that is perfect for rainy days.

People stop me often to comment on this coat. Actually, all the time.

Sometimes I give them Deb’s number.  ”Maybe she would make another.”

But right now this is the only one she has ever made.

Wearing it makes bad weather okay. Kind of enjoyable. Magical even.

Here is a peek at where Deb sews and makes.

Her creative space is a nook in her basement.  It is cozy, full of vintage and so inviting.  I love all her thread.

Everything is so organized and inviting.  I just want to stay and play here. I love my cottage studio, but I appreciate how Deb can walk downstairs when everyone is sleeping and be in her own space.  There is something really nice about that.

I just wanted to show you this special coat before it gets put away for the season. One of these days is going to be the last day I wear it for a while.

Maybe today is that day. Fingers crossed.

Ps.  What I love best about this coat is that it is an exchange of talent and ideas.  It is salvaged and upcycled, just like my art.  Have you  traded with an artist friend?  Is your exchange one of your prized possessions?  Oh, please share.  xo

Kelli Jean May-Krenz lives in Minnesota, and is an amazing graphic designer with her own studio, 730 Thursday, which is the exact time and day she met her soulmate five years ago.  She uses found objects in her design work.  And she simply shines everyday.

So brightly.

I sewed the envelope and her perfectly written “hello friend” into an altered book I am working on.

I then posted the above photo on my facebook page to tell Kelli how much I loved her card. She had written the sweetest words to me.

I have her card taped wide open on my studio wall so I can read it often.  Maybe daily.

Kelli responded to my facebook post and asked “Are you digging your sparkle?”

I felt fear.  Did something fall out of the envelope? Oh no.

“Sparkle?”

Then today there was a beautiful box waiting for me from Kelli.  Almost too pretty to open.

Look inside with me.

Everything was wrapped in teal and gold paper and vintage clothing patterns.  To me that is gold and diamonds.  Pieces I can sew into the pages of altered books. Or collage into my art.

The little details were amazing. Look at this sweet girl all tucked in. Art for sure.

And below is the treasure underneath her blanket.  Yes…the sparkle.

It never fell out of my envelope.  It was making its’ way to me.

It is beautiful.

The level of talent and thoughtfulness just took my breath away.

My daughter was as fascinated as me with this box of goodies.

“She is a friend of yours?”

“Oh yes.  I just love her.”

“Where does she live?”

“Minnesota. Right now. But she will live in Florida soon.”"

“Have you met her?”

“No.  I will someday though.”

Still, I feel like I have met her.

She LOVES music and sewing on paper…just like me!  I know she is a girly girl from her core and adores vintage.  She drinks water filled with fresh fruit and her creativity and positivity are contagious.

And she clearly knows me.

Look at these sweet bits of paper.  They make me giddy.

And a bag filled with ribbons and vintage fabrics. Oh…I will play. For hours.

Can you see this sweet little clip in the shape of a dress? I adore it.

And this little porcelain dog beside some of the best candies I have ever eaten…

I shared a few. And ate the rest. All gone.

So good.

And my very favorite…all of Kelli’s fabulous Pearl Button art tied with ribbons.

I swoon. So tactile. So joyful. So long time ago sweet mixed with creative genius.

I feel blessed.

Kelli…thank you.  How did you know this little box of goodness would be like water in the desert for me?

And you must offer this whole box of goodies on your new website. Just brilliant.

I am so very grateful to you.  For all your encouragement and kind words. Your attention to small details. Your crazy talent. And for your sparkle and shine.

I will play your kindness forward. I am so glad I met you here.

Isn’t it amazing how connected we can feel with someone we have never met?

Yet.

ps. As soon as Kelli’s new website is up, I will post it here. xo

Moments when I am so caught up in what I am doing paint is dripping from my hand.

I like my hands covered in paint. I may grab a paint brush but still like the feel of the object as I paint over an edge with my finger.

I took these pictures this past Friday.  I spent all day in my studio playing with altered books, paint and paper.

A glorious day.

Magical.  One page drying while I paint something else.

Today I photographed lots of new work I will put in my shop.  Me, a chilly day, a bit of sunshine, my camera, my art and a beautiful farm.

As I was driving down the farm road headed home, I was thinking about what I had to do next before these photos were in my shop…resizing, watermarking, filing, writing copy and uploading.  Taxes. Blog post.  Email blast.

Thinking how my Monday “to-do” will  drip into Tuesday. Thinking about dinner, the wash I left in the washer, the altered book classes I will teach this week.

Then I stopped to check my studio mailbox.

I could see a bit of washi tape and a colorful envelope as I opened it.

And in it was a card with a really happy lama from Jessica Brogan, a sweet talented artist and friend of mine living in Austin.

It was filled with little scraps of colorful paper,  a stamp from a letter, a picture of a clock…

And these words…”I hope you are well and I just wanted to tell you I think you are lovely“.

Honestly? Jess you are lovely. And yes, right now I am very well just knowing you thought of me.  Thank you.  I really needed your kindness. So much.

ps.  Jess and I met in an online class.  I haven’t met her in person. Yet. Connections are powerful.  So is a hand-written note.  Have you done that lately….just sent someone something out of the blue? It means so much.